I can't watch pbs sober anymore
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
