Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My friends, they love my intelligence
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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