At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I did not marry a roomba.
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