Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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