is your mom at the bar?
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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