Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
