those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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