Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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