Is it normal to miss your booty call?
wrigley field is MILF paradise
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
