If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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