so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
