The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
please come you make the beer taste better
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
