I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
