yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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