I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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