I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize