I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
