i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
