I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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