how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize