My nipple is on Facebook.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
