yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
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