They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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