Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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