the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
