Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I wish I only lived at night.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
