garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Randomize