I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
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