I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
