No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
where are my eyebrows?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
He has the fingertips of a God
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
