me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
It's official drugs can't kill me
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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