you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize