your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Randomize