..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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