Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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