apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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