I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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