Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
