so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
