this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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