Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
My dick has a subreddit
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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