how can u be prego again
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
