i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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