Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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