i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
