Your tits are I can't wait for
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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