my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
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So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
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She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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