I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
