theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
