Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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