do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
